Kids Say the Darndest Things
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
ALAN, age 10:
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you
like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should
keep the chips and dip coming.
KIRSTEN, age 10:
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to
marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
CAMILLE, age 10:
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
FREDDIE, age 6:
No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get
married.
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
EDDIE, age 6:
Married people usually look happy to talk to other people.
DERRICK, age 8:
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
LON, age 8:
Both don't want no more kids.
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
LYNNETTE, age 8:
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say If you listen long enough.
MARTIN, age 10:
On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually
gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
CRAIG, age 9:
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the
newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead
columns.
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
PAM, age 7:
When they're rich.
CURT, age 7:
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
HOWARD, age 8:
The rule goes like this: if you kiss someone, then you should marry
them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
THEODORE, age 8:
1 don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing. I'm never
going to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed out.
ANITA, age 9:
Its better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need
someone to clean up after them.
KIRSTEN, age 10:
Single is better, for the simple reason that I wouldn't want to
change no diapers. Of course, if I did get married, I'd just phone
my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper
changing.
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
KELVIN, age 8:
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
ROBERTA, age 7:
You can be sure of one thing - the boys would come chasing after us just the same.
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE MARRIAGE WORK?
LORI, age 8:
If you want to last with your man, you should wear a lot of sexy
clothes, especially underwear that is red and maybe has a few
diamonds on it.
RICKY, age 10:
Tell you wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck.